It’s Holy Week for Christians in the Western Church (Eastern Orthodox churches use a different calendar, so Easter for them is much later this year). This year, I thought I would share some reflections about Jesus at his crucifixion. These come from a journal entry after I returned from our pilgrimage to the Holy Land in 2022, and they seem particularly apropos, given the war in Gaza.
When Jesus was hanging on the cross, did he ponder all he had not been able to do? Did he wonder if things might have been different if he’d had a chance to talk individually with the people who taunted him as he hung there?
As he struggled to breathe on the cross, did he wonder: “What if I’d had more time? What if I’d come down to Jerusalem more often? What if I’d been more pushy, more brazen with my message of love?”
Did he grieve the hard-heartedness of souls who could taunt him when he was down, or did he recognize how desperately they were seeking to bring themselves up by doing so?
Once again, I’m confronted with my vast limitations. Because of pilgrimage, I now have a window into lives halfway across the world that I cannot help, cannot save, can hardly influence, and most likely will never see again. They do not know or care about me. It brings such grief, and I am barely able to sense why…but it’s huge. Maybe this is why St. Francis walked the streets grieving. I want to hug the whole world.
As war continues in the Holy Land, and more innocent civilians continue to be killed, my grief expands to encompass every soul injured or killed (on both sides), every livelihood ruined, every home demolished, every sacred trust violated.
I still want, somehow, to hug the whole world. I wonder if Jesus did too.
I invite you to take these questions and wonderings into the days ahead, regardless of whether you observe Holy Week. What griefs are you holding these days?
So many thanks for your most compassionate & heartfelt emotions & words here Sister Shirin. Our conscience must still be the North Star; leading us forward when all else may fail…
You’re welcome, Alex, and Amen! May your Holy Week be blessed with deep insights and blessings….
Peace,
Shirin
I agree with Alex about your compassionate and heartfelt emotions. And with your pilgrimage of 2 years ago, you do have a real feeling of what it’s like to be living there amidst all the carnage and destruction. You wonder what Jesus pondered on the cross. Having been in just a little pain compared to Jesus’s recently, I wonder if he could get past his agony to think of anything at all. But he was Jesus, after all, so he probably did ponder all the things you mention. And I, too, expand my grief to include the suffering in the Holy Land and other war-torn places around the world. Blessings and thanks to you.
Oh, Aston, what a good point about Jesus’ physical pain! Thank you for reminding me, and all of us, of that fact. It might have made him less able to be compassionate, about self and others…or it might have helped him to just let it all go and endure….
Let us pray for all who are in pain….
Peace,
Shirin